The campground in Kerrville, Texas was nice and quiet. We slept well until there were 5 dogs in bed with us, several of which began feisting around with each other. Pretty soon it was impossible to sleep any longer. My watch said 7:30! No wonder the natives were restless!!! That was 7:30 Texas time but really 5:30 in dog years (Pacific Time).

We fed and walked the girlz (not necessarily in that order) and took nice long showers. We dry camp a LOT so Navy showers are the norm for us. When we have the luxury of a campground, we love leaving the water on the entire time in the shower so we don’t freeze while soaping.

We left around 9 and headed out for Kyle, about a two hour drive. The scenery was actually nice. There were rolling hills and the vegetation was growing thicker all the time and with more and more trees. Soon we began seeing quaint farms scattered every so often but then the farms gave way to urban sprawl. When I saw Home Depot and Chili’s, I knew we were not in Kansas any more (so to speakJ).

We passed by housing tracts on both sides with “New homes from the $100s!” and lots of road construction to make room for all the new occupants moving into their “homes from the $100s!” No wonder people are moving to Texas in droves! Where else can you buy a brand new home near a city like San Antonio for $100,000??? They were nice homes too, not crappy homes.

There were lots of new stores and strategically placed Wal-Marts (a sure sign that civilization has arrived in the area!) and in no time we were in the heart of San Antonio. We should have listened to my cell phone GPS instead of the Co-Pilot GPS. The phone GPS (a woman of course!) wanted to take us around all the city mess but the Co-Pilot (a man) took us right through the thick of city mess and construction. It was there that the trouble began…

I could see there was a wreck that was happening ahead of us. Traffic was slowing and coming to a stop. I said, “NANANANAAAA” (which means LOOK OUT!) but Mel kept driving the same speed. He waited until he was nearly on top of the stopping cars before breaking. Now, remember, this is NOT your mother’s Ferrari we are driving, this is the 64,000+ pound Global Warmer that is pulling the very long and heavy Ford Extortion. He pressed harder and harder on the brakes and soon, things began flying off the counters and the dogs were all in my lap looking for comfort, except Josephine who had quickly discovered that one of the items that had hit the deck was the large container of Isabella’s kibble. By the time I was able to peel the quivering dogs from my lap, Josephine had consumed more than her share for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I made my way back to Josephine’s treasure, knelt on the floor and tried to hold her off while, at the same time, I scooped up the remaining kibble. By then, the other girls had discovered the bounty on the floor, forgot all about being scared and began helping themselves as well. I tried to fight off 6 dogs, scoop kibble and try not to panic when I hear Mel saying, “This lane is WAY too narrow for this thing!” Now, there are many times I think the lanes are way too small for the Global Warmer but have never heard Mel say so! This was scary!!! I was thankful I was on the floor scooping kibble.

Once I had picked up as much as I could, I let the 6 little piggies eat the rest and took my seat back up front just in time to see a line of cars merging into our lane and traffic once again slowing. Not having learned anything from the last time, Mel once again waited until the last minute to slam on the brakes and then bitched like hell that “those IDIOTS shouldn’t slam on their brakes like that”! I thought about holding my tongue but anyone who knows me, knows that wasn’t going to happen! So, after waiting a few minutes for my heart to work its way back down to my chest from my throat, I asked him why he always waits until the very last minute to apply the brakes when it is only obvious that traffic is slowing ahead! I reminded him that he wasn’t driving a sports car and that this was how he has been braking since I have known him (a good 33 years!). Already in nagging mode, I took the opportunity to also point out to him that if he applied his turn signals sooner than when he was already changing lanes, perhaps somebody might let him in once in a while! He, of course, had a different version and insisted I was wrong. Silly me! I should have remembered he has been driving for 54 years and I, OTOH, have only been behind the wheel for a mere 42 years so obviously Mel is a better driver than I. I hate to tell him that his reaction time isn’t what it used to be.

Then we had a little argument (the best kind of argument because I knew I was right) about where we had eaten the last time we were in Kyle (a year ago). Being vegans, it is difficult finding places to eat where “regular” people will also be happy. Somehow, not eating seared animal flesh is disgusting to many folks and the thought of tofu will send them running to the nearest toilet to toss their cookies yet decomposing meat ripped from dead animals is dandy. Anyway, he insisted we ate at a Mexican place. I said we ate at a Chinese place. He said he remembered eating chips! I said, they were Chinese chips then! We will have to wait to ask his daughter, Barb, to find out who is right.

Mel wanted equal time to state his side of the story but I told him this was MY blog and if he wanted air time he could write his own damn blog!

We pulled into the RV Park close to Barb’s place. There were lots of nice large trees and it seemed OK. Once in the park, however, it became obvious that this RV park was mostly permanently inhabited by folks who might be a little down on their luck. Some of the trailers and motorhomes haven’t been anyplace is a very long time, nor will they be going anyplace in the near future due to missing wheels and other broken parts. I fully expected to hear the banjos from Deliverance at any moment!

Mel set up the yard for the dogs using a bunch of X-pens and then let them all out to potty. Having all been cooped up for days, they were jumping out of their skin to run. They are all in great condition (well, except Isabella the Slacker) and are acting like stalled fit race horses. MeMe saw a chance to make a break for it when Mel opened the gate. I happened to look out the window and saw her darting and diving around the campground with a HUGE smile on her face. I could hear her yelling, “Free at last! Free at last! Thank GOD I am free at last!!!” as she disappeared behind some older crumbling but occupied cabins next to us.

There was a large Texan whittling on a long piece of driftwood next to his old trucks and trailer across from us while his rotund Dachshund watched our dogs with great interest. By the looks of the guy’s belly, he enjoyed a brew now and again. When he saw little MeMe heading back towards the motorhome at full speed and looking over at him, he snatched up his little sausage of a dog and held it close to the safety of his ample bosoms. I heard him yell to Mel in a thick Texas drawl, “Hey! What kinda dawgs is them?”

“Poodles” Mel answered.

“No Kiddin?” he bellowed back and put his little dog down, obviously feeling secure that no Poodle would or COULD ever hurt his little wiener. Good thing Isabella/Kujo wasn’t loose out there!

Now we are settled in for the night and will leave first thing in the morning. Next destination – Palmetto, Florida.

Helen & The Girlz (Mel Too but I do think he needs to get his own blog)

PS. Mel’s daughter confirmed those were indeed Chinese chips we were eating last time we were here J God I love being right!